“So, Are You Dating Anyone?”

“So, are you dating anyone?” Since college, this question has been a source, at best, of discomfort; at worst, of insecurity. Those who ask are well-meaning; most simply just making conversation. I…


YouTube Porn and the Search for Manhood 

So, last night I found myself looking at YouTube. Only this time it wasn’t videos of screaming goats that sound like humans, or about some crazy zits being squeezed, or about decapitated reptile…


"Who am I that the Mother of my Lord should come to me?” 

I always knew I was different.   I could never quite put my finger on it but I always knew that I was not like the other boys. I always felt disconnected from my same-sex peers like I somehow just…


How Fitness Helps Me with My Same-Sex Attractions

It has taken me a long time to understand how to face my feelings of same-sex attraction. Overtime, I found that a lot of it involves keeping my mind in good spirits, and to do that I can see that…


I Needed and Wanted This

“Father, I need your help.  I experience same-sex attractions.” Hearing these words would be a familiar experience for many a Courage chaplain. It is a bit different, however, when the one speaking…


Gone Swimming

“…we become estranged from our body, looking at it as an object…” Crosby, John F., The Personalism of John Paul II   I’ve had a distorted body image for many years; in fact, I’d say, for most of…


You Are Worth It

Growing up, I felt I was different from the other girls. I didn't care about makeup, clothes, or boys; what I longed for was attention and nurturing from women. My mom was emotionally unavailable, so…


The Hidden Beauty of Brokenness

In the three years I've been a part of the Courage Apostolate, I've noticed we members are so often keenly aware of our own wounds. There can be commonalities - sometimes wounds of rejection,…


How Did I Get Here?

“How did I get here?” That’s the question that keeps coming to me in prayer.  The answer has been the same every time: Because God does not tire of being generous to us.  A few weeks ago, I made a…


Letting Go of "Mine"

Last night at the Courage meeting one of my brothers said something that rang a bell with me. He said something like, I feel like I own my friends. This reminded me of an old friend of mine who used…